Thursday, March 24, 2011


Every day seems like yesterday to me. From the past week now, I’m struggling for words and how should it be done. Never in my life was I confused and bothered as today. I never expected nor dream that I’ll end up this way. I still wish it never came along. It stayed where it should be and what it should be.

Now it seems like I’m waiting for nothing and maybe chances aren’t made for this. Honestly, if I am given a choice, I won’t choose this. But this is the reality. Turning back and running away isn’t a good choice or else I’ll end up with regrets. I don’t want to chase another pavement when I’m not yet done with this one. 

My heads spinning with words and I can’t catch up. I took deep breaths a lot these days. How can it be this heavy? So much thing in mind that should let go, uttered to someone. 

Now that I’m ready to face the truth, I’m denied. I missed to see the reality because all I believe is what I know was right like what to feel and what to show. I'm ready to slow down and walk down the stairs to hug what suppose to fit in. I failed to understand myself. I go against what I truly feel. As I went along I saw myself pretending and as time went by I saw myself in the end of the road alone. Before, I don’t want to look back although it’s tearing me.  I was afraid that when I look back I’ll see no one there for me.

I have a lot of things to say and confess. It seems opportunities and chances are against me now. I have to bear the pain of keeping these words by myself. I’ll be left alone with actions not showed, questions unanswered and words unspoken.

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